Red-tapism:
 
Take a cage with apes. In the cage we hang a banana on a string,
and put a stairs under it. Before long an ape goes to the stairs
towards the banana, but as soon as it even touches the stairs,
all apes are sprayed with water. After a while the same ape or
another one makes another attempt, with the same result: all
apes are sprayed. If later another ape tries to climb the
stairs, the others will try to prevent it.
 
 Now we take one ape from the cage and put in a new one. The new
ape sees the banana, and wants to climb the stairs. To his
horror all other apes attack him. After another attempt he
knows: if he wants to climb the stairs, he is beaten up. Then we
remove a second ape and replace it by another new one. The
newcomer goes to the stairs and gets beaten up. The previous
new ape takes part in the punishment with enthusiasm.
 
  A third old ape is replaced by a third new one. The new one
makes it to the stairs and get beaten up as well. Two of the
apes who beat him, have no idea why you may not climb the stairs.
  We replace the fourth old ape, and the fifth, etc until all
apes which ones have been sprayed with water have been replaced.
Nevertheless, no ape ever tries to climb the stairs.
 
"But Sir, why not?"
"Because that's the way we do things here, lad."
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Q. Where do you find a tortoise with no legs?
A. Where you left it.
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Minnie Mouse is a slow maze learner.
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Q: What do you call a fly with no wings?
A: A walk.
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Q: How come your hands are all blue?
A: When I was walking home from the bar the other night, some drunkard
   stepped on my fingers!
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All things are possible except skiing thru a revolving door.
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IEGOYC = Insert Ethnic Group Of Your Choice)
 
IEGOYC 1: We've decided to keep pigs.
IEGOYC 2: Where you going to keep them?
IEGOYC 1: Oh, in the house seems the best place.
IEGOYC 2: In the house?! What about all the shit?
IEGOYC 1: Oh, the pigs'll soon get used to that.
 
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"I'd love to go out with you, but my favorite commercial is on TV."
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"I'm so sorry, but my karma ran over your dogma."