Bureaucracy:  a method for transforming energy into solid waste. 
LEMMINGS DON'T GROW OLDER, THEY JUST DIE 
BE REALISTIC: Plan for a miracle 
LOVE THY NEIGHBOR, TUNE THY PIANO 
 
Real People Wear Fake Furs. 
You have a seat belt; has it hugged you today? 
Speed Pays _ the doctor, the hospital, the mortuary. 
Illiterate?  Write for free help. 
MY  OTHER  CAR  IS  A  REAL  OTA 
  
Seen on a Saab:     Key Mow 
Seen near the Stanford Linear Accelerator:   
     Beware of Quantum Ducks, Quark! Quark! 
Support mental health, or I'll kill you! 
 
Help Stamp Out Intolerance! 
I'm not FOR apathy and I'm not AGAINST it. 
Have you hugged your money today? 
I'VE BEEN TO THE SHOP THAT SELLS BUMPER STICKERS 
 
Prosperity is our God given right 
SAVE THE CHOCOLATE MOOSE! 
Archaeologists will date any old thing. 
I refuse to participate in the RECESSION 
DANGER!  I drive like you do. 
 
I BRAKE FOR BRICK WALLS 
IF U [heart] NY GO BACK! 
JazzerSleep 
FIGHT ORGANIZED CRIME, STAMP OUT THE IRS 
I cannot be fired. Slaves have to be sold 
 
ESCHEW OBFUSCATION 
The highway of life is always under construction 
DOES THE NAME PAVLOV RING A BELL? 
WELCOME TO LOS ANGELES NOW GO HOME 
DO LOS ANGELES A FAVOR. WHEN YOU LEAVE, TAKE SOMEONE WITH YOU.  
 
I'm so poor, I can't even pay attention! 
I love, I owe, so off to work I go. 
Illiterate? Write for free information. 
WARP 6 A Law We Can Live With 

 
HAVE YOU HARASSED A TOURIST TODAY? 
THE  TROUBLE  WITH POLITICAL JOKES IS THEY  GET ELECTED. 
PASS WITH CARE, DRIVER CHEWING TOBACCO 
KISSING A SMOKER IS LIKE LICKING AN ASHTRAY 
  
WHEN I GROW UP, I WANT TO BE A PORSCHE 
HONK IF YOU'RE CUTE, RICH, & LOVE HORSES 
LEAVE ME ALONE I'M HAVING A CRISIS 
THE BEST THING TO SPEND ON YOUR CHILDREN IS TIME 
 
I HATE BUMPER STICKERS 
3 GOOD THINGS ABOUT SCHOOL: JUNE, JULY, AUGUST 
SUPPORT YOUR RIGHT TO ARM BEARS! 
IGNORE APATHY 
 
Seen on a plumber's truck: 
   In my business, a flush beats a full house. 
On a well worn, ca 1967 Volkswagen: 
   Driver Carries No Cash