Here's one that I read about recently in a humor column in a local
paper:
 

One would-be bank robber was a victim of his own bad timing.
The robbery was to be at a bank in Washington DC I think, near
a large FBI office, on the payday of the FBI agents.  When the
ill-fated villain got to a teller and demanded money, he heard
17 federal pistols clicking behind him.
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      A drunk approached a gas bar late at night and told the
      attendants he was robbing them.  When they refused to
      give him anything, he threatened to call the police.
      When they still refused, he called the police.  When
      the police arrived, the drunk was promptly arrested.

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Back in 1986, the fairy visits Lech Walesa (polish reformer) and grants him
three wishes.
Lech Walesa says: "My first wish is that the Chinese conquer Poland and
                  retreat."
The fairy replies: "That's a strange wish, but I'll grant it. Your 2nd wish?"
Lech: "I wish that the Chinese conquer Poland and retreat."
Fairy: "Gee, that's *very* strange! And your 3rd wish?"
Lech: "I wish that the Chinese conquer Poland and retreat."
Fairy: "Now, you must explain me why you have such a strange wish 3 times!"
Lech: "Well, if the Chinese conquer Poland 3 times, they have to pass through
      the USSR six times!"

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As the airplane approached the Rocky Mountains, the captain noticed that they
weren't going to make it over. He ordered the plane's cargo jettisoned. That
was almost enough. He was still short by about 500 lbs. So he went back into 
the cabin and asked for volunteers to jump from the plane. "I only need three
to make it over the mountains. You will be saving the lives of 250 other 
passengers." One gentleman stepped up, said "Viva la France" and jumped from
the plane. A second man stood, shouted "God save the Queen" and jumped. After
a few long moments, a Mississippian jumped up, shouted "Remember the Civil War!" and
threw a New Yorker out of the plane. 
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Well, you've seen the sign on the truck for Art's Electric, haven't you?
 

 
LET US REMOVE YOUR SHORTS!

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How many
Baptist preachers does it take to screw in a lighbulb?
        A1: They don't go in for that kind of stuff, at least when anyone's
looking.
        A2: And Jesus said, "I am the light of the world."  So who needs light
bulbs?
        A3: One to pray for guidance, one to proselytise, and one to pass the
hat. They prefer a full choral backup, but can make do with an organ playing
"Just As I Am".