Death is nature's way of telling you to slow down
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Q: How do you get fresh air into a Russian church?
A: You click on an icon, and a window opens.
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Madam, there's no such thing as a tough child _ if you parboil them
first for seven hours, they always come out tender.
            _ W. C. Fields
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One Russian and one Polish workman were digging the foundations for a new
road. After several hours of hard toil, the Polish guy hits his shovel on
something hard in the ground. Both men work hurriedly to dig the object out
and discover that its a treasure chest. On opening it they find jewels,
coins, gold etc. beyond their wildest dreams. Both are wild with happiness
and dance around madly. When they have calmed down, the Russian takes the
Polish workman's hand and earnestly says "Sir, we will share this just like
Russian - Polish comrades should" and the Polish guy says "Oh no, 50 - 50".