Kiss me twice.  I'm schizophrenic.
 
What I tell you three times is true.
 
He hadn't a single redeeming vice.
                -- Oscar Wilde
 
 
The moving cursor writes, and having written, blinks on.
 
 
If time heals all wounds, how come the belly button stays the same?
 
 
Anthony's Law of Force:
        Don't force it; get a larger hammer.
 
 
 
"Sherry [Thomas Sheridan] is dull, naturally dull; but it must have
taken him a great deal of pains to become what we now see him.  Such an
excess of stupidity, sir, is not in Nature."
                -- Samuel Johnson
 
 
Barth's Distinction:
        There are two types of people: those who divide people into two
        types, and those who don't.
 
 
God is a comic playing to an audience that's afraid to laugh
 
 
If you think the United States has stood still, who built the largest
shopping center in the world?
                -- Richard M. Nixon
 
 
A university is what a college becomes when the faculty loses interest
in students.
                -- John Ciardi
 
 
Putt's Law:
        Technology is dominated by two types of people:
                Those who understand what they do not manage.
                Those who manage what they do not understand.
 
 
 
"Grub first, then ethics."
                -- Bertolt Brecht
 
 
There are three ways to get something done:
        1. Do it yourself.
        2. Hire someone to do it for you.
        3. Forbid your kids to do it.
Jokes