A man, who barely made it through the Black Monday crash, called E.F. Hutton
the next day and asked, "May I speak to Mr. Spenser, my broker, please?"
 
The operator replied, "I'm sorry.  Mr Spenser is deceased.  Can anyone else
help you?"  The man said no and hung up.
 
Ten minutes later he called again and asked for Mr. Spenser, his broker.
 The operator said, "You just called a few minutes ago, didn't you?  Mr.
spenser has died.  I'm not making this up."  The man again hung up.
 
Fifteen minutes later he called a third time and asked for Mr. Spenser. 
The operator was irked by this time.  "I've told you twice already, Mr.
Spenser is dead.  He is not here!  Why do you keep asking for him when I say
he's dead?"
 
The man replied, "I just like hearing it."
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Yet more from the Program Trader Nelson article (WSJ, Oct 13, pg 39):
     One time, a broker typed in the wrong password (on the Bankers Trust
     computer), which happened to be another broker's password.  "So they
     both had this same list of securities.  I get a call from a broker
     saying, `I'm trying to buy XYZ and it keeps getting bid up out there.`
     We couldn't figure it out.  Then it suddenly dawned on us that (two
     different brokers) were working the same list."
Both brokers were getting the same list of stocks to buy and sell, and were
bidding against each other.
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Gary Hart's big mistake:
 
He should have had Ted Kennedy drive her home that night. :-)
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"Maybe this world is another planet's Hell."
                                -Aldous Huxley
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Did you hear that Ted Kennedy asked his young beautiful secretary to be his
mistress?
 
She hesitated to begin the relationship and asked Ted:  "But what if I should
become pregnant?"
 
Ted said, "Don't worry, we'll cross that bridge when we get to it!!"
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More IT'S A SMALL TOWN
 
      You know you're in a small town.....
 
when you turn on your hair dryer and the street lights dim...
 
Everyone knows whose credit is good, and whose wife isn't.

Jokes