Unidentified Scientist:  "After two years of trying,
scientists at the Yerkes Regional Primate Center have
managed to get a chimpanzee pregnant."  Which proves that no
task is repugnant to a true scientist.
 
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Irv Kupcinet: "What can you say about a society that says
God is dead and Elvis is alive?"
 
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A countryman between two lawyers is like a fish between two cats.
                _ Ben Franklin
 
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A Los Angeles judge ruled that "a citizen may snore with immunity in his own
home, even though he may be in possession of unusual and exceptional ability
in that particular field."
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A man said to the Universe: "Sir, I exist!"
"However," replied the Universe,
"the fact has not created in me a sense of obligation."
                _ Stephen Crane
 
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Be self-reliant and your success is assured.
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For economists, the real world is often a special case.
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Ask five economists and you'll get five different explanations (six if
one went to Harvard).
                _ Edgar R. Fiedler
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A meeting is an event where minutes are taken and hours wasted.
Jokes